


Unspoken love

by ithilliya



Category: K (Anime)
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-05
Updated: 2016-11-05
Packaged: 2018-08-29 06:58:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8479609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ithilliya/pseuds/ithilliya
Summary: Kamamoto falls in love with his best friend but sadly there isn't any winners in the game of love





	

**Author's Note:**

> Main ship in this story is Kamamoto/Yata.  
> Storyline involves SaruMi break up.

_I am so happy to have you in my life_

When Kamamoto heard that both him and his childhood friend Yata are members of red clan, Homra, Kamamoto couldn’t be happier. Yata has always been someone who Kamamoto had looked up to. Yata Misaki, energetic red-haired boy with sparkling hazel eyes and who hated to be called by his first name because he thought it was girlish, had been the bravest and strongest kid of neighborhood. Kamamoto Rikio, who had been chubby since he was a kid, and wasn’t that confident about himself because he had been too often the ‘fat kid’ who were bullied by other kids, had really admired Yata. He was so happy to be reunited with his childhood friend. He was sure that Yata had grown even more brave and strong during those years they haven’t met each other.

 

But when they finally met at the bar Homra, which was base of the red clan, Kamamoto saw that Yata hadn’t grown that much. Actually Kamamoto almost felt that Yata had shrunk. How could Yata be so small and… Cute?

 

“Ahh!!! Kamamoto! Whoa man, you have grown up so much! Man when did you get so tall? That’s crazy!! And you even have a beard? So cool!” Yata yelled when he saw Kamamoto and ran to give a big hug for his friend. Then Kamamoto realized that yes, Yata hasn’t shrunk, he had grown himself and Yata instead… Well, let’s just say that he hadn’t gotten that much taller. But his personality seemed to be exactly the same what Kamamoto remembered and it made him happy.

 

“I’m so happy to see you again Yata-san! It has been too long since we last saw each other,” Kamamoto said, and smiled at Yata. Yata flashed a stunning smile back at Kamamoto and his eyes were sparkling with happiness. That look in Yata’s eyes always made a nice fluffy feeling inside of Kamamoto.

 

Suddenly Kamamoto felt like someone was watching him, and he saw that Fushimi Saruhiko, dark haired, pale skinned very thin boy who wore glasses, was glaring at him and Yata angrily. Gloomy boy didn’t say anything but his message was still pretty clear: don’t touch my Misaki. Because Kamamoto didn’t want to cause a fight, he quickly took a step away from Yata.

 

Kamamoto hadn’t really even ever talked with Fushimi, but he had heard rumors about him. He was said to be really anti-social, but really smart guy. Kamamoto had never thought that that kind of guy would be someone to make friends with Yata, but somehow those two had ended up being best friends and they were even living together. They had also joined Homra together.

 

It looked like Yata had also noticed Fushimi’s glare so he gave a fist bump to Kamamoto and said: “Talk to ya later. I need to go check how Saru is doing. He seems to be annoyed by something again, haha!”

 

 

_You are my best friend_

After their reunion, Kamamoto and Yata started slowly getting closer to each other again. Even though Kamamoto was the bigger and stronger one physically, he still admired Yata and saw him as his ‘boss’ and Yata seemed to be pretty happy about it. Fushimi, though, didn’t seem to be happy at all that Kamamoto and Yata were being so buddy-buddy, and one evening when most members of Homra were gathered in the bar, Fushimi came to pull Kamamoto aside and muttered to him:

 

“We need to talk”.

 

Fushimi led Kamamoto outside the bar, and when he had made it clear that there wasn’t anyone from Homra around them, Fushimi spoke. “Misaki and I are dating. If you come between us, I’ll cut your throat open, fatso.”

 

Kamamoto had heard rumors that there was something more than just friendship between Yata and Fushimi, so he wasn’t too surprised about Fushimi’s words. But the one thing he was surprised about was how hostile Fushimi was towards him.

 

“Yata-san is only a dear friend to me. I am not trying to come between you two, so relax.”

 

Kamamoto’s reply made the boy with glasses only click his tongue angrily.

 

“Don’t lie to me. I’ve seen how you watch Misaki.”

 

“Dude, I’m straight! You are imagining things!!”

 

Was Fushimi totally out of his mind? Where had he gotten the idea that Kamamoto was gay? Kamamoto had never thought of Yata as more than as a friend. Man, Fushimi must really be the jealous type for thinking everyone around Yata as someone who tries to steal him away from him.

 

“Tsk… Whatever. I’m still watching you” Fushimi muttered, turned around and went back inside the bar before Kamamoto could even reply to him.

 

“There isn’t any reason for you to watch me. I am NOT gay.” Kamamoto muttered to himself, and also returned inside the bar.

 

_I will stand by your side always_

When Fushimi left Homra, Yata’s world seemed to collapse. He was constantly angry, but everyone close to him could tell that anger was Yata’s only way to hide how hurt and sad he really was. If someone even accidentally mentioned Fushimi’s name, Yata started to yell that he doesn’t want to hear that traitor’s name. The first few days were really rough on Yata, and Kamamoto basically moved in with Yata for the first week after Fushimi’s betrayal, because he wanted to check that his friend was alright. Yata was first against it, but gave up pretty fast because Kamamoto made it really clear that he wanted to be there and support his best friend no matter what.

 

At first night that Kamamoto was spending at Yata’s place he woke up in the middle of the night and he heard muffled sniffing from Yata’s bed. At first Kamamoto thought that he’ll ignore it and pretend to be sleeping but after short while he gave up, got up off the couch where he was sleeping, and went to sit beside Yata’s bed.

 

“Yata-san… are you alright? Can I do something?” he asked softly, and when he spoke the sniffing sound stopped right away.

 

“A---ah, sorry that I woke you up… God I’m so lame. I don’t want you to see me cry,” Yata muttered under his blanket.

 

“Yata-san… It’s ok to cry when you’re sad. It doesn’t make you weak. My mom always said it’s good to let it all out, that way you feel better.” Kamamoto tried to cheer his friend up, and gently patted the place on blanket where he thought Yata’s head would be.

 

“I… I don’t want to cry because of that idiot anymore.” Yata’s teary voice whispered, as he pulled his head out under the blanket, and looked at Kamamoto with his wet eyes.

 

Yata’s red hair was messy, and his usually ~~so~~ bright eyes were cloudy from all the tears. Kamamoto had never seen his friend that sad, and seeing Yata in that vulnerable state made Kamamoto feel a little weird. Yata almost looked like a little kitty that someone had kicked, and Kamamoto had the urgent need to give a big hug to Yata. And so, he did. He climbed into bed next to Yata, and gently pulled him between his arms and clumsily patted Yata’s back.

 

“Everything will be alright. I am here for you.” Kamamoto said with gentle voice, and soon he felt Yata start to cry against his shoulder.

 

He cried against Kamamoto’s shoulder until he fell asleep. When Yata finally had fallen asleep, Kamamoto got up from the bed warily because he didn’t want to wake up Yata. When he had gotten off the bed, he looked at Yata’s sleeping face for a while, before going back to sleep on couch.

 

That night, a strange feeling awoke inside Kamamoto, but he didn’t want to admit even to himself that what that feeling really was.

 

_I’ll do anything for you_

Time passed and Kamamoto moved back to his place, but he still kept visiting Yata’s place way more often than he did when Yata was still together with Fushimi. Before he knew it Kamamoto had become Yata’s best buddy again, and they were hanging out for most of their free time together. Kamamoto really loved to spend more time with Yata, but it also made it harder for himself to deny his feelings. He was falling for Yata.

 

When it was Kamamoto’s 19th birthday, he had invited most of Homra boys to have a party at his place. They played video games and drank beer together. When night started to fall, people started to leave and finally only Yata was left with Kamamoto.

 

Yata was totally wasted. He was rolling on Kamamoto’s bed, hugging a pillow, and babbling how cool Mikoto-san is, as usual. Yata hadn’t even drunk that many beers, but because he hardly ever drank it took only few beers to make him drunk.

 

“Yata-san, you are way too drunk. I bet you’d get lost if I let you try go home by yourself. I think it’s safer for you to stay here for tonight. Okay?” Kamamoto suggested.

 

“I am not drunk!” Yata argued, and accidentally rolled off the bed. He hit his head on floor with a bang, but  after a short pause he started to laugh like crazy.

 

“Ahahaha, oh my god I fell from bed! Ahaha, okay maybe you’re right. I might be little drunk. I’ll stay here, if it is your wish and makes you feel better, birthday boy!” Yata declared, and winked playfully to Kamamoto.

 

Kamamoto shook his head and laughed at Yata, who was way too adorable when he was in that playful mood. Kamamoto had never imagined that tipsy Yata could be that cute. All he wanted to do now was cuddle and snuggle Yata on the bed all night long. But Kamamoto knew he couldn’t do that. He was way too shy to make a first move. Especially when Yata hadn’t ever shown any kind of romantic interest towards him. Yata was seeing them only as friends. And Kamamoto didn’t want to ruin their friendship. He loved Yata so much that he wouldn’t risk the relationship they have, just to have little fun while they were drunk. And Yata wasn’t that drunk that he would forget it if they did something that night. That’s why Kamamoto thought that it was not good idea to cross the line now. Or maybe ever.

 

”Ok, I don’t want to be party pooper, but you have enough beer for tonight. Party’s over. Let’s get some sleep. But first, you need to drink water so you won’t die from a hangover tomorrow morning. I’ll go get you water, so try to calm down a little. Okay? I’ll be back soon” Kamamoto said, and headed towards kitchen to get some water.

 

When Kamamoto returned to the bedroom, he almost dropped the water glass he was holding because the sight that was waiting for him in bedroom took his breath away. Yata had taken off all his clothes except his underwear, and he was lying on bed looking super sexy. It had been a while since Kamamoto had seen Yata without shirt and it seemed that his slender body had got some muscles since. Kamamoto really had to pull himself together for few seconds before he took a step closer to Yata, and shoved the water glass into his hand.

 

”Drink this. After that, we can go sleep,” Kamamoto announced, and switch off the light before he started stripping himself. When Kamamoto was also wearing nothing but underwear he had to decide where to go sleep. They were in his home so it would be natural that he would sleep in his own bed, but Yata seemed like he wasn’t moving his ass away from bed any time soon.

 

“Umm, Yata-san? Are you going to sleep in my bed, or do you want to go sleep on couch?” Kamamoto asked the red haired boy who was eagerly drinking water. In his head Kamamoto was thinking that he totally wouldn’t mind about sleeping in the same bed with Yata, but he wasn’t sure would it be ok for his friend. Last time they had shared a bed they had been both young kids. Two adult men sharing a bed might feel little uncomfortable.

 

”Well… If it’s ok for you, I’d like to stay in this bed. It’s so comfortable in here. And c’mon, this bed is big enough for both of us! Or… would it be too weird for us to sleep in same bed? I totally get it if you don’t want to share a bed with a drunken gay guy. I could go and jump on you, haha!” Yata said, joking a little to lift a mood, and it instantly made Kamamoto feel a lot better.

 

“Pffft, I am not scared to share a bed with you!” Kamamoto laughed, and jumped on bed next to Yata.

 

Yata reached over to nightstand besides Kamamoto’s bed, and placed the empty water glass on it. He rolled under sheets, and flashed a bright smile to Kamamoto before he said, “Good. Because I’d really like to share a bed with someone tonight.” Then his face turned more serious, and his expression was even little sad when he said, “I think it’s one of the things I miss the most… Sharing a bed with Saru… He always snuggled himself so close to me… I could feel his breath in my neck when we went to sleep together. It felt so nice…”

 

Yata’s confession was followed by awkward silence. Kamamoto didn’t know if it was smart for him to comment on what Yata had said in any way. Yata rarely spoke about Fushimi these days, so Kamamoto really didn’t know how to react. But after a short silence Yata continued.

 

”I feel myself so pathetic when I’m still crying after Saru. I bet he has moved on already. And, I know I should move on too, but… It’s easier said than done, man.”

 

Yata let out a deep sigh and looked Kamamoto into eyes. Yata’s hazel eyes were full of pain, and it made Kamamoto really sad. He just wanted Yata to be happy. He wanted to see his hazel eyes glimmering with excitement.

 

“Yata-san, I am sure you will find someone so much better than Fushimi someday. Someone who appreciates you. Someone who loves you more than anything. I’m sorry for being so blunt, but Fushimi wasn’t good enough for you. You really deserve better,” Kamamoto said, and stroked Yata’s hair clumsily.

 

”Thanks man. For everything. And, sorry if I ruined your party mood. This was your day, and still I started to ramble about my own problems…” Yata mumbled, and rolled closer to Kamamoto.

 

“No need to thank me or say sorry. Of course I’m here for you. That’s what friends are for. And, you can ramble me anytime.” Kamamoto replied, his heart skipping a beat or two when Yata snuggled himself between Kamamoto’s arms, and gave him a gentle hug.

 

“You’re such a good friend… so warm,” Yata said with a low voice, which was barely louder than whisper.

 

Yata’s head was resting against Kamamoto’s shoulder, and Kamamoto could feel Yata’s warm breath against his neck. The position where they were in was kind of… romantic? No no no. It couldn’t be. Kamamoto was just imagining things. Yata just wanted to be close to his friend because he was feeling sentimental. There was no way that he wanted - - -

 

“Kamamoto, I feel so lonely. I want to cuddle with you.” Yata whispered, pressing his lips against Kamamoto’s neck, making Kamamoto almost jump out of the bed.

 

“Y-yata-san what are you --!!”

 

“Uh…S-sorry. I got carried away by the moment. I’m sorry… You aren’t even interested in men. Sorry for being gross ---“

 

“You are not gross Yata-san! Don’t say that. You are wonderful the way you are. You just surprised me” Kamamoto said, and quickly moved back closer to Yata.

 

“If you… If you really want to cuddle with me… It’s okay. I kinda want it too. I don’t care that you’re a guy. If it’s with you, it’s okay” Kamamoto whispered.

 

Yata lifted her gaze to Kamamoto, and stared deep into eyes for a moment, before he leaned towards Kamamoto and gently pressed their lips together. They paused for a moment and looked each other before Yata pressed his lips against Kamamoto’s lips a second time. This time his kiss was more demanding than the first one. Kamamoto wrapped his arms around Yata more tightly and started to caress Yata’s back softly while they started kissing each other even more passionately. Soon Kamamoto felt Yata’s tongue licking and sucking his own, and low moan escaped from Kamamoto’s lips when Yata tucked his fingers in Kamamoto’s blonde hair. They both were panting pretty heavily already and soon Kamamoto had to push Yata little further from himself even thought he’d love to continue what they were doing.

 

”Yata-san… are you sure you want to do this kind of thing with me? Because if we continue, I don’t know if can I hold myself back” Kamamoto muttered.

 

Misaki’s cheeks were bright red and he had strange look, a look that Kamamoto had never seen before, in his eyes when he said:

 

“I don’t want to ruin our friendship. You are far too important friend to me. But if… If you want cuddle and I want cuddle, there isn’t anything wrong in this, right? And if this ends up being something more than cuddling… I don’t mind. It might be because of alcohol but at this very moment I feel so comfortable around you. I don’t want to think what happens tomorrow morning. For tonight I am all yours. It is your birthday after all, Rikio~”

 

“If it is ok for you then it is ok for me too. Whatever makes you happy, Yata-san.”

 

_The truth is… I love you more than anything_

It has been about a month since the Dresden Slate was destroyed. Yata and Fushimi had become close friends again during that month. Yata seemed to be happier than he had in ages, and seeing that warmed Kamamoto’s heart. But, he still he couldn’t feel too happy himself because here he was, feeling jealous of Yata again. He knew how much Fushimi meant to Yata, everyone knew that. That’s why it was so wonderful that those two had finally made up again but… Kamamoto feared that he would now lose Yata for Fushimi forever. It was clear that Fushimi would be Yata’s number one again and Kamamoto, who had got that position in Yata’s life during the past few years, wasn’t happy to lose that position to Fushimi.  But the brutal fact was that there wasn’t much he could do about it. All that Kamamoto could do to make himself even little bit happier was to think that this was how things should be. This is how Yata is happiest. And Yata’s happiness was what Kamamoto wanted the most. If they couldn’t be happy together, at least Yata deserved happiness with someone else. And he seemed to be happy now with Fushimi, so Kamamoto just had to suck it up.

 

Kamamoto was lost deep in these thoughts, sipping his beer quietly in the Homra bar, when Yata and Fushimi walked in together. Great. The duo Kamamoto just wanted to see. Yata was all smiles again, and explaining something to Fushimi who seemed to be rolling his eyes at Yata’s ridiculous explanation of whichever topic they were talking about.

 

Kamamoto didn’t even want to make eye contact with Yata at that moment because he was feeling so gloomy, so he just sunk deeper in the sofa where he was sitting, ~~on~~ and focused his stare on one of bar’s fishtanks. But it seemed like that Yata wasn’t paying any attention to Kamamoto either because he rushed through the bar, and straight to barcounter where Kusanagi was working.

 

“Kusanagi-san! Did you find that fondue pot I asked for the party?” Yata asked, and the bartender nodded to him.

 

“Yes, it’s in the back. Come with me.” The tall blonde said, and opened a door that led into the storage room which was placed behind the bar counter.

 

Before Kusanagi and Yata left the room, Kusanagi spoke to Kamamoto, “Kamamoto, watch the bar while I’m gone. It will take a couple of minutes for me to explain to Yata how fondue the pot works.” And then, they both disappeared into the storage room.

 

When Kamamoto and Fushimi were left alone, awkward silence fell between them. To Kamamoto’s surprise, it was Fushimi who took the first step and sat on a seat next to Kamamoto, and opened his mouth, “You still haven’t said anything to him? You’re pathetic.”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

Kamamoto was surprised by Fushimi’s words. They haven’t really talked in ages so the way Fushimi now started their conversation sure was little surprising. But it seemed only to be natural for Fushimi to continue their conversation where it has almost been left years ago.

 

“I’m talking about Misaki. You still haven’t told him about your feelings? Pathetic. I thought you’d done your move while I was gone.”

 

“Even though you weren’t here, Yata-san was still always thinking about you.” Kamamoto replied little angrily and took a long sip of his beer. “I’m surprised that you’re even saying that. I thought you were going to tell me stay away from him again now that you are back.”

 

“Tsk… It doesn’t interest me anymore whom Misaki is with. Misaki and I are just friends now.” Fushimi said, and clicked his tongue lazily.

 

“You really aren’t interested in him anymore?”

 

“No.”

 

“I have kind of a hard time believing that. You used to be so obsessive about him.”

 

“That was ages ago. I’ve moved on. It is not your business, but I am dating someone else now so… Misaki is all yours.”

 

Fushimi’s words made Kamamoto’s heart skip a beat. He had assumed all this time that Yata and Fushimi  would get back together, but if Fushimi was seeing someone else then… Then Kamamoto had some hope?

 

Kamamoto opened his mouth to answer Fushimi but at that very moment the door of storage room opened again and Yata and Kusanagi stepped back into the bar.

 

“Okey, Saru, I got it. Let’s keep going!” Misaki said energetically, and smiled happily to Fushimi who stood up and gave a small nod to Kamamoto before he left Homra with Misaki.

 

When Kamamoto watched Yata and Fushimi go he had realized one thing. Even though Fushimi had moved on it didn’t mean that Yata had. He still had his eyes on Fushimi. Fushimi was the only one who could make Yata’s eyes sparkle like that. And it meant that Kamamoto still didn’t have any chances. Yata wouldn’t look Kamamoto like that, no matter how much Kamamoto hoped for it.

 

“…just better to keep my mouth shut. Like always.” Kamamoto muttered to himself and continued drinking his beer.

 


End file.
